Tags:essays
SELF THERAPY
Self therapy is actually a practice used by thousands of years by the humans … to analyze, define and why not even redefine the inner souls … for simple becoming a better self … on the scene of life.Can be used by anyone … with only one condition …. to not lie yourself anymore … and become in the same time the therapist … but also the patient.It’s a non ending process … but i guarantee you … it worth to bother doing it. Realizing the connection with the self … it all becomes different and the answers to all our questions ….will come by themselves … helping us to see the real paths that we should follow in life.It’s quite simple.It works …And we should try it!
EXPLORING SOULS
I think during my lifetime … i’ve been annoyed one million times.I was annoyed of lots of people and the circumstances created by them … and many times … my reactions were really ugly.I’ve blamed everyone.On and on and on.And even if i knew that it was all a reflection … when it came about my own life … i was blind and could not accept such a theory.I was living 2 parallel lives … one where i was a theoretician that is analyzing and defining life …. and one living on the scene of my real life … where i was ignoring all i was doing in the first life.It was a total nonsense to have 2 lives in the same time … instead of mixing them .. and trying to create a hybrid version for my existence.There were moments when i was laughing of myself … of how silly i was … but …Well … i was blind.I count not connect the 2 realities.I could not be … just one.It was like i had … 2 souls inside of me … which was probably the most ridiculous idea i could come with.But …. time was passing … and i was starting to understand… what was wrong.I had indeed … 2 souls.One was the self … the real one, the one connected with the Universe … and the other one was …. my ego … my fake self … which looked all the time … so damn real.I continued my life … balancing.On and on …. and on.In fact i was not applying my spiritual knowledge to my own life … and i kept being annoyed.No matter how good the curent reality was … i always found a reason … not to be satisfied … or even continue being unhappy.It was like i was ignoring … even perfect case scenarios.Well … in both of my parallel lives … i was analyzing a lot …. all around myself … but as a thinker i was looking at everything with detachment … and on the scene of reality … i was treating everything … as real.There was no … detachment.I had to mix my 2 personalities … and become just one.It was ok that i was analyzing everything and everyone … but i had to stop judging and most important to ignore … or at least to pretend i don’t see the dark side of all was going on.I had to stop being annoyed.I had this freedom of exploring souls … but i had to learn to practice … the acceptance.Being annoyed … was so, so stupid of me … cause i was annoyed of … my own reflection.… of what i disliked on myself.Exploring deeply the world and all the souls i was seeing on the scene of reality … was ok.But … the wisest thing i could do … was to let my 2 parallel lives to interfere.Apply the spiritual principles into the real life.Forget about the illusion … of myself.
PRETENDING
All my writings are kind of a … self therapyAnd i was writing on and on and on …. defining my feelings and thoughts … But it was a little bit funny realizing the contradiction between what i thought, what i felt deep inside of my soul … and how i was acting on the stage of life.… analyzing and defining myself … the one that i thought i was … deep into my soul … and the one from the outside world … i was realizing it’s such a huge difference.And still … i was trying to be better … but all i was doing was … pretending … on and on and on.But why?!Why … this huge different between my inner self and the one from the stage of life?!I knew the theory … and knew all i had to do … and i was really pretending … i was doing the right thing, but … Well …. most probably my real problem … which was a huge one …. was probably that i was disconnected from my inner self.I knew about that self.I knew it exists … and i had to be one with it … and even if i was pretending i was doing the right thing … it was all a lie.I was lying myself … pretending … on and on and on …Why?!Why?!Why?!Until one day … when i decided that i need to stop doing that … and practicing the process of self therapy … i started to be more honest in front of myself.Cause … I was simple … wasting my life … pretending … and i really had to redefine myself.
Sad ... or unhappy?!
Beautiful soul.Sad face.Unhappy human.I look at them.But all look unhappy to me.And i start to wonder what is going on.Also ... what is really the difference between sadness and unhappiness.Unfortunately ... i can't clearly understand.Not yet.I believe i know it ... but it is not true.My mind is full with illusory thoughts.Then i see her.I look at her amazing charm.And i penetrate ... her beautiful soul.... wondering as an idiot why such a sad face ... and unhappy human being.Cause ... all is illogical.Unfortunately ... this is life.For ugly souls... but also for beautiful ones.
THE DIRTY MIND
Expressing all our ideas … or thoughts is most probably …a must.Accepting that into one point we’ll be shocked discovering our dirty minds … it’s also a must.But i believe it’s all part of understanding us as humans.Concepts us spiritual ugliness … sins … and many other similar ideas must be avoid for a while … if we really want to heal our broken souls.We should not be surprised …. or socked and not try to avoid … the truth.We should simple allow our personality to be expressed the way it wants to be expressed.… and stop judging ourselves.Yes … we should allow ourselves to be wild … allow all our thoughts to be expressed in any way they need to be expressed … but also do your best to practice the acceptance …
THE PAINTER THAT NEVER PAINTS
The painter that never paintsUnfortunately many times in my life, i was acting as my friend ... the painter ... that painter that was never paintingIt was Paris ... about 4-5 years ago.Someone introduced me a lady, which was a painter ... a very smart lady ... a genius i could say and it was a pleasure to spent time with her.We became friends.We started to go out everyday to the amazing coffees shops from the central area ... the ones close to the Seine and we were talking for hours.She was telling me about her next paintings and was describing me in tiny details all the elements of the scenes.Had an amazing way of talking ... but also knew a lot aboutart.In few weeks ... me ... a guy that did not knew anything about art, started to understand what is the whole meaning of art in our lives.Soon i understand that she is not painting anymore, cause, for the moment, she does not have the necessary money for painting materials .... and right away i give her an amount that she could start again.I also promise her to not worry, cause i will give as much as she needs to continue her work.Few days later, i dare to ask her if she started to work on the paintings that she was telling me about ... and suddenly she became very annoyed.Not understanding what is really going on ... being a polite person ... i succeed to change the subject and we continued in a nice way our conversation while drinking the amazing parisian coffee, but few days later i ask her again the same question.Suddenly she changed her face and became so angry that i thought for a second that she wants to ... kill me.I could not understand what was wrong.I was asking a painter if she was started to paint ... cause now she had the money for the materials.Again i succeed to avoid the useless conflict with her, but going to her apartment, which was small like any parisian apartment ... i see no painting materials.In the end she tells me that the materials will come in few more days, cause it was a delay to her order, but also asks if i can give her some extra money, for another order also.I smile ... cause in Paris you find painting materials in the city center and she could buy them right away ... but i give her the money she asked for.Before leaving the apartment, in the last second ... i see drugs on the small table from the entrance.I smile again ... and understood she used the money to buy drugs instead of materials.I saw at her house about 15 paintings and indeed she was a great painter, but she was the painter that was actually never painted.I leave ... and i get mad.It was all a trap.I was fooled like a 5 years old kid by this lady and actually i was helping her to take drugs ... without realizing not even for a second what i am doing.She called me later on ... 100 times, but never answer her back.Even told me that she will go to the Police to make a complain against me ... but could not clearly understand why.One year later, i accidentally meet her near the Opera ... and she was pretending that she did not knew my name anymore.I smile ... we exchange 2-3 words and i leave.But one day, 2 years later ... i was meditating again over the subject for about 2 weeks.Something was unclear for me ... and did not knew what and why.I judged her too much ... but maybe i was also the painter that never paints ... many, many, many times in my life.My parents supported me to study at the University of Polytechnics ... but i was not going to courses and instead iwas losing my time in the coffee shops all day long.I was the student that never went to classes ... and i was doing same as the painter that was never painting.I complete University, i open a company and i had so many clients that sometimes i took money from my clients, spent them ... and forget to deliver the promised services to the clients.It was such a chaos at that time, that it was a total mess with the orders ... so ... i was doing what??!I was the businessman that promised to deliver some services that were never delivered.I was judging the painter ... but i was worst as her.The list with my silly mistakes from life ... was huge.I remember i read hundreds of books of personal growth ... and one day i even read a lot about management if conflicts ... and guess what i did next after i finished studying that subject?!I laugh ... while writing to you ... cause what i did was that i had more and more useless conflicts with the people from my life.So ... the best definition of myself could probably be the same as that silly lady ... the painter that never paints.
DOMINATING AND BEING DOMINATED ... a way of wasting our lives
Maybe life is too short to waste it with … useless things.Maybe it’s time to start meditating more.To analyze our behavior … but also the one of the people around us.To pay attention to the impact of influences over our lives … but also on the lives of others.Understand that … domination … no matter of its character… positive or negative …. It’s a concept that we should not allow it to become real.And we should also be aware of how a simple small influence … that is repeated on and on and on … could become … dominance …. without even realizing.
ONE DAY … ONE SOUL
Over the years i’ve been meeting lots of people ... which i the end ... i would like to call them ... souls.In fact i was dealing with thousands of them ... and i had moments when i’ve wondered myself ... why do i meet the whole spectrum of the human beings?!What is the message behind that?!What the Universe is trying to whisper to me?!But what i can say that it was funny ... was that i met people i liked, people i disliked, people that i liked and then i disliked and ... people i disliked and then i liked.The interactions were of so many different types ... that i almost started to believe that i am at school ... a school where i need to understand what the human being is.But i had to understand ... the whole spectrum of them ... no matter who they were.There were moments when i was almost forced to deal with certain prototypes of souls that i not even thought that exist.Yes ... i felt ... forced by the Universe ... to meet many of those persons ... but i knew it was a reason it was happening.I had events when I thought some people were trying to destroy me ... but at the end of those stories i had become a better and also stronger person.And i also met persons that i thought that they will somehow rebuild myself ... and ended the story with them almost ruined emotionally.But i realized one thing ... everything had a purpose ... to reveal me what life is about ... by having so many interconnections with the people from the world.Today ... same as always ... i still love socializing ... with everybody ... but i don’t judge the connections anymore.I see it as a ... life experience ... and in fact as a blessing in my evolution as a human being.I know that every human i met ... it’s just a reflection of my inner self.When i meet good people ... i need to pay attention at all those positive attributes i see ... but also keep them active as much as i can in my personality.And when ... i meet people i dislike ... i have the courage to admit that they are ... the reflection of that part of myself ... which in fact i dislike.But ... i admit that i still have moments when i believe in the illusion of life ... believe in the duality ... and that i am not wise enough.I continue to analyze and define everything i see on the timeline of my own life ... but also keep active the process of redefining myself.And i love being the witness of ... my life.
DEPRESSION … THE GATEWAY TO THE REAL HAPPINESS
Most probably … the worst disease of our times is … the depression.And … unfortunately we can see it everywhere … at many souls from the stage of our lives.But what i personally discovered is that depression is not really something … 100% negative.I see it today … more as an aggressive signal … which is whispering us that … we forgot to be … happy.Nothing more … nothing less …
PERCEPTIONS
It’s all just … a perceptionMe and Arij … try to define life.We do it … almost … as a hobby.We became without even realizing … what some people would define as … philosophers.But we feel more … just … ordinary persons … that simple can’t stop thinking of the meaning of life.Our own lives … but also of life in general.And all we write … it’s kind of a philosophical dance.A mix of perceptions …. very well synchronized.The perceptions of an … ordinary man … and the one of an amazing … young … feminine spirit.And the question that might come into your mind … could probably be … what it’s the purpose of this book?!Why did you bothered to write it?!Well … first of all … cause we love talking about philosophy … but also give the others the impulse of realizing anyone has the right and the power to talk about the existence of the human being.Starting the philosophical journey … talking about contradictory issues …. might be … weird … difficult … butalso … annoying.But time will pass … and continuing walking into this path … we get used …We start enjoying it …And then …. we believe … we found the absolute truth.I smile … cause i did that one million times.On and on … and on.Later … changing my perceptions … into a totally contradictory direction … i realized the illusion of all those thoughts and believes.Today … all i am doing with Arij … it’s almost for fun.It’s like we would tell you that we decided to go fishing and enjoy the day … but …. our hobby it’s not about fishing, but about … philosophy.It’s about a path … that we believe that will reveal us the meaning … of life.All we write about … are simple … perceptions.… our own perceptions… from a certain period of our lives.Nothing more …… nothing less.But … we continue doing it.Nobody could judge us … cause it’s all about a hobby of ours.And you all … have this fundamental right of analyzing and defining the world too.No one is allowed to … judge you.Express your self …Dare to do it … in silence or … very load.Even Kant’s ideas … or Rumi’s ideas … and all the other great thinkers … were just … perceptions.So ….Join us … on this philosophical path … and ….Who knows?!Maybe the real secrets will be revealed to you … quite soon.Much sooner as you might expect ….(Adrian Gabriel Dumitru)
KARMIC ENERGIES
Karmic stories … are ugly … or at least this is what we believe about them … but realizing we need to analyze and define their meaning very clear … and then try to redefine our inner self … it’s most probably a must.Karmic energies are real … even if we believe it or not … and it’s not easy to get rid of them.But we could start to accept that …. as part of life … and also as a spiritual journey … which we need to follow into this Universe.It might not make sense at all … but … the real truth is always revealed later …
THE DANCE OF OUR EMOTIONS IS A … NONSENSE … BUT A MAIN PART OF OUR LIVES
It is difficult to understand the human being ... but even worst ... it is even more difficult to understand our own souls.... our habits.... our desires.... our tendencies ... the ones we follow.Everything defines us ... from the past ... present and ... a possible future ... one that might appear in the way we want it to be.And when we start to analyze what is really going on with us ... but also understand that life is ... not just a collection of perceptions and emotions ... we start to keep wondering why the soul is always following so many contradictory directions.Why today we feel joy inside of the soul ... but tomorrow we feel so damm overwhelm by many negative energies ... from all around us ... that in the end makes us feel miserable …and the beautiful vibe is disappearing ... and never come back for long, long time.It’s funny cause the Universe does not want us to be unhappy, but to understand the illusion of life .... with everything that means ... problems, difficulties, hard situations etc ... but to realize that always ... at the end of the storm ... a beautiful sunny day is appearing.... and we should learn to enjoy it ... but we remain focused on the storm ... not seeing the beauty of the new sunny day.I smile seeing in the timeline of my life ... a dear friend that is keep repeating me everyday, almost as a mantra ... “It’s a new day! Let’s enjoy it!” ... and i am wondering is he smokes marihuana ... or i am totally blind ... not seeing the same reality he is watching at.Today ... what i know for sure is that my friend is not smoking anything ... but i haven’t the guts to accept my blindness ... and start treating myself.I see no difference between me and my friend ... but looking at him ... i can’t understand yet if he is still suffering of disease that i suffer by such a long time ... the dance of my emotions.I realized about this illness i have ... and i also realized ... studying the statistic that defines my life ... that my reality is just a reflection of all those feelings i carry in my soul.The short story is ... amazing vibes .... amazing life ... negative vibes ... a reality painted just in grey colors ... and nothing more.It’s quite a simple concept!But i continue staring at this silly dance of such contradictory emotions ... going to the left, then to the right ... then to the left again.The music itself ... is so damm boring ... but instead of pushing the stop button ... and end this dance forever ... i believe is a natural fact for the human being.And i accept it ... even if i should take the decision of creating the habit of connecting just to beautiful vibes ... the ones that makes me feel the joy of being alive.I suddenly realize that what i explained to my friend that it’s a beautiful dance of emotions ... is actually a collection of contradictory feelings that are ruining my life.The message of my friend was quite simple ... “It’s a new day ... let’s enjoy it!”.But maybe it was so damm simple that i did not considered it as being ... a good advise.This dance was controlling my life ... and even if i had the solution ... i was not taking any decision.I preferred to continue my life ... as a journey to lots of pathless paths ... not realizing that it is time to stop ... and ask the inner self ... “ What should i really do?! What is the path destined to me?! Which is the real direction i should follow” .... and maybe pray ... as this silly dance of annoying contradictory feelings to stop.And one day ... i started to finally think at the fact that i am not my emotions or my perceptions.My mind was playing around with me .... cause i never thought i should master my mind ... and not let the mind control myself.And the mind ... keeps generating all types of scenarios ... or perceptions ... then different types of emotions are appearing ... and many times contradictory ones ... amplified in a silly way ... and actually controlling my life.The truth is ... and i accepted that ... i had not become a master of my mind ... at least not yet ... but i started to desire as the dance ... to stop. And not just to stop now ... but stop forever.I don’t want to live like this anymore.I want a life connected ... only at the beauty of what life has to offer.So ... at least ... i have a dream.The one ... of getting rid of the non sense that was defining my life for years.Deep inside myself i realized it is a difficult change ... but once i’ve taken the decision ... and also keep it in mind as a powerful desire ... i am on the right path.I pay attention to everything ... to all the details that are influencing my perceptions and emotions ... analyzing ... defining ... as in the end to always redefine the script of my life ... and keep me connected to amazing vibes.